My body is a Wonderland

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Meet November and August! They were born in October.

Here is their birth story.

Two and a half weeks ago I fell down the rabbit hole the stairs. I don’t know how it happened. I was feeling out of sorts the whole day and I went to bed early, my head all muddled. Andy thought it was odd. I just thought that I was tired and pregnant. I got up to make the long trek to the bathroom a while later and on the second to last step downstairs, I twisted my ankle and fell, landing on my side. I think I screamed, and Andy definitely yelled as he ran down the stairs after me. When he asked me if I was okay all I could think was, “How did I get here?” He helped me up to a sitting position and I felt a warm gush. I sat there in a pool of my own tears, hoping it wasn’t blood. My waters had never broken before.

All I could say was: “Oh my god.” and “I’m not ready!” and “I hope the babies are okay!”

Andy kept reassuring me that they were, and that he was more concerned about my ankle than any thing else. I couldn’t care less about my ankle (which was fine), I was about to give birth to TWO BABIES OMG. I was so full of adrenaline that I just sat there, teeth chattering, while I tried to figure out if I wanted to stand up. And then, after Andy helped me up, I stood there, teeth chattering, wondering if I should maybe start moving. It was weird, going into labor at night. I’d always been woken up early in the morning. “Should we call your doctor?” Andy asked. “What should we do?” It was a lot to decide. Going to the hospital seemed like the next logical step. Andy went to go wake up the boys, we’d put them to bed an hour or so before. He also called our friends Andy and Meg; Meg was to meet us at the hospital.

She walked me in as Andy went to find parking. “Did you cut your hair?” I asked her as the people at the front desk helped me into a wheelchair. They laughed because priorities and wheeled me to a tiny room because triage. Some faceless person asked me if I was sure if my water had *actually* broken. The puddle I left in the wheelchair answered their question.

40 minutes after we arrived at the hospital, I was pushing out a baby. But before that happened my kids and husband showed up to the tiny room and I moaned awhile. My kids asked, now fully awake: “Why is she making noises like that?” Meg talked to them about their moaning mama and what it all meant while I continued moaning.

“The last time she got like this, it didn’t take long,” Andy said as he pushed my back with all of his strength. No one took him seriously. THEY WOULD SOON LEARN. The plan was a caesarian, but they took too fucking long. Right before they wheeled my bed out of the room I said, “I feel like I have to poop.” A resounding UH OH. They wheeled me faster while I yelled, “I’m pushing!” Some faceless individuals threw some stuff at Andy to put on while we raced down a hallway. I couldn’t stop pushing. “Don’t push!” They told me. Not pushing was not an option. I couldn’t NOT push. I was pushing.

“Help!” I cried. “I’m pushing!”

“Don’t push!”

I was pushing. 40 minutes after we arrived at the hospital, I was pushing out a baby. I was shocked when Nova crowned, because I didn’t actually expect to give birth so quickly.

“Head!” I yelled. “HEAD!”

A couple of faceless chatting nurses rushed over to my spread legs and grabbed the baby shooting out from between them. Told ya, I thought smugly. And then maybe, c-section my ass. I barely got to whisper hello to Nova before they took him away (I didn’t see him again for a day and a half. It makes me want to cry thinking about it).

“I guess we’re doing this vaginally,” said my doctor who was not my doctor. I almost did a fist pump. She and a faceless person pushed down on my stomach for a bit to try to turn Gus, but it didn’t take. He was still coming out feet first, and I was feeling like I just HAD to push again. Since he was so much bigger than Nova they were afraid he’d get stuck, so emergency c-section it was. She told me that I would have to be put under and that Andy would have to leave the room. Both of our faces fell.  But I kept pushing and yelling, “Help!” until I blacked out.

When I woke up what felt like 2 seconds later, Andy was there to welcome me.  “Are they gonna do it?” I asked in a scratchy voice. Andy said, “They already did it.” and I said, “Oh right, that makes sense.”

Meg had taken the boys to her house to sleep and so it was me and Andy and Gus. Gus had been born 20 minutes after Nova, but after midnight so they had different birthdays (and maybe even different signs)! “That’s so cool!” one of the faceless nurses was saying. I couldn’t help but laugh but I sobered up quickly, when I was told that Andy and I couldn’t visit Nova in the NICU (low birth weight) since we both had nasty colds that wouldn’t quit. It was horrible to be separated from him. One of the nurses from the NICU was a sweetheart and brought Andy and I pictures of him so that we could see how he was doing.

With my last two deliveries I was able to leave the hospital rather promptly, and that wasn’t going to happen this time around. I hated being in the hospital, hated being separated from my kids and husband, hated eating hospital food, hated having my blood pressure taken every five seconds (it was worryingly high), but luckily I didn’t have to worry too much about my c-section incision. I was moving around pretty well after a couple of days to everyone’s surprise, including my own.  Some of the nurses winced sympathetically for me when they heard that I’d had both a vaginal birth and a caesarian, but I’m glad my original birth plan wasn’t a total wash. I got to deliver one of them naturally, and that makes me happy.

When Nova was finally transferred to my room I was overjoyed.

IMG_2430One of the nurses asked me, “How can you tell them apart?” And I just stared at her. They look like brothers, but they don’t look identical to me. Which is kind of a relief because now I don’t have to worry about mixing them up.

You know what? Let’s just fast forward to us all being home. Here we are, courtesy of my MIL who, along with Andy’s stepdad, just left after a week here:

105_0517RIO IS KILLING ME IN THIS PICTURE!!! Ahem.

The twins are here. THEY’RE FINALLY HERE. I’m so happy to be home and so grateful to all of our wonderful friends and family who have watched our kids and made us delicious food. And speaking of food…I’m off to eat some more while the babes are still sleeping.

 

toods

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Filed under Baby, Family, KIDS., Life, Love, Twins

I know I’ll make it, love can last forever

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SAM_1981 Thrifted dress and leggings, Reef flip flops

SAM_1956Thrifted JCrew cardigan, thrifted Tea dress, Talula leggings, Miz Mooz flats

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SAM_1960Thrifted dress, Miz Mooz flats

THIRTY THREE WEEKS!!

I’m still sick. Yeah, I know. It sucks. And then I threw out my hip lifting the stroller into the van (whoops). And I’ve been gagging daily. And my hands and feet are swelling. It’s sooper attractive. Oh, and I’ve been having random crying jags. Poor me.

But I’m good. Seriously. I am really excited about nearing the end of this pregnancy and meeting my two guys! <— every post summed up until I pop, pretty much. Get used to: I’M ALMOST THERE, THE BABIES WILL BE OUT OF ME SOOOOON WEEEEEE!

Plus, Halloween is approaching and with it everything is pumpkins and fall leaves and most importantly HONEYCRISP APPLES ARE IN SEASON. They taste like candy you guys.

The boys are insanely excited about being Mario and Luigi this year. I’m trying to get together a Toad costume for Rio. If it doesn’t work out, we’ll tell him the dragon costume is Yoshi. He might be too smart to have the wool pulled over his eyes though…we’ll see how it goes.

toods

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Filed under Preggers in PDX, Preggerville, Stylefile, Thrift/Vintage

Ramblings

 31 weeks. 34 years old.

SAM_1901Thrifted Liz Lange maternity dress, Talula leggings, Miz Mooz flats

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I turned 34 last Thursday. Rio turned 3 the next day. Here we are, the birthday kids (HEISSOADORABLE):

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Hair update! I compared a picture from last year’s birthday and am soooper jazzed at the amount of growth that I’ve acquired.

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Some things I’ve picked up for the babes:

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I found a Hayden Harnett EROL tote at William Temple thrift a couple of weeks ago and I thought it would make a fantastic diaper bag.

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And now I’m off to check on that turkey soup I’m cooking. I’ve got a horrible cold and it’ll definitely hit the spot.

toods

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THIRTY 30 THIRTY

 

SAM_1896Thrifted Dear Creatures dress (Buffalo Exchange), Talula tights, Miz Mooz flats

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YASSSSS. It’s all coming along. I’m hoping I just have another 7 or 8 weeks, and then we can finally meet these babies! We’ve chosen names already, so it’s been a welcome change to Baby A and Baby B. I’ve disclosed the names to some family members and friends and the concern trolling has been relatively mild. One of my sisters told me, “Oh, don’t do that!” and I responded with, “Sorry, this is happening.” Another family member jokingly threw out some over the top absurd names on FB for the twins. I found it amusing the first time around, not so much the second. I get it: people know not to expect traditional names from us; when Madrox was born I was treated to “THINK OF THE CHILDREN!”, etc. It’s amazing how many people own crystal balls: “He’s gonna get teased and it’s all your fault!” What I wish I could have predicted was how difficult it would be for people to simply pronounce his name. Mad Rocks? Really? I got a call from the dentist’s office the other day confirming his appointment and the receptionist called him Matrix, I’m pretty sure. That’s just sad. When I suggested his nickname to one of the kindergarten teachers at his school (because seriously, stop butchering my kid’s name, I’m giving you an out here), who after multiple tries still couldn’t wrap his head around the complicated pronunciation, the ADULT said, “Well, I don’t want to call him Mad, because then I’ll get mad and he’ll get mad…” Andy: “Yeah, he doesn’t like that.” For shame. What are you doing, teacher of children? I’ve yet to have a kid tease Mad about his name. Adults, on the other hand? Ya know, people who should know better? Yep! Reading this post made me nod my head until it almost fell off. My whole thing is: there are plenty of names that I think suck (a lot of “normal” names top that list btw), I just don’t go around acting like my opinion actually MEANS something. I talk shit behind closed doors, like you should do.

River and I have birthdays coming up next week! Sadly my morning/all day sickness is on an upswing lately and I haven’t been feeling up to much. Andy has been pushing me to schedule a prenatal massage and so that’ll be a nice birthday present. I can’t wait.

30wksAt the children’s museum today, trying to find a scrap of shade. Soooo hoooooot. My feet and fingers are swelling as we speak. I never thought I’d pray for rain in Portland but if there’s a god…hear my prayer.

toods

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Woman of Steel

 

SAM_1855Thrifted Bailey 44 column dress, Pink Studio mary janes

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SAM_1857TWENTY NINE WEEKS, U GUISE. This is when I tell you how nervous I am about going into labor even though I’ve done it three times. Because I’ve never done a two-fer. HOW DOES THIS WORK. (Don’t answer that)

So this is not a maternity dress, no duh doy. I’d first seen many versions of this column dress pop up on style blogs that I frequented like, yeeeears ago, and I loved the look of them but the price not so much. When I came across it on Anthromollogies, where it was worn during pregnancy, I thought, “How cute!”

Well, I found the EXACT same version at Value Village the other day (HELLSYEAH). It’s pilling a bit but still looks to be in pretty good condition and it stretches quite nicely over my engorged belleh! I would never have attempted to wear this dress during pregnancy if not for Anthromollogies, and I know it’ll translate quite nicely when I slim down after squeezing these kiddos out. HUZZAH!

Here’s another number:

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He loves me so much he trimmed his beard for me.

ELEVEN YEARS U GUISE.

DO YOU KNOW WHAT TODAY IS? It’s our anniversary. Anniversary. It’s our anniversaaaaaaryyyyyy.

Wow. I’ve been married to this red bearded dude for a really long time. I love him even though he mentioned a SIXTH kid while I have two inside of me right now.

To celebrate we went and saw How to Train Your Dragon 2 with the boys while eating pizza and burgers and hot dogs.  We also got choked up because pregnancy hormones, u guise. >.> Tonight, there will be ice cream.

Also, Mad’s a kindergartener now! It’s kind of weird having two kids in school.

IMG_2112He’s adjusting really well. I’m glad but also sad because well…my baby. He’s growing up!

*sniffle*

Anyway, here’s some more pictures from this pregnancy:

IMG_2078Rio being adorable, geez.

SAM_1795 IMG_8382Taken three years apart at the Oregon Aquarium. I like to go when I’m heavily pregnant, apparently.

SAM_1805An outfit from last week.

toods

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Filed under Life, Love, Preggers in PDX, Preggerville, Stylefile, Thrift/Vintage

Twenty Seven

SAM_1686Thrifted Loft dress, Miz Mooz flats

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SAM_1689A pose that Mad suggested, swear.

SAM_1692See no evil.

From earlier in the month:

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SAM_1679I am so excited to almost be in the third trimester YASSSSSS.

I’m definitely feeling it. It’s getting harder and harder to sleep comfortably, I wake up with my hips screaming and I have to get up several times a night to go the bathroom. Downstairs. The heat hasn’t helped but it has been cooling down, thank goodness. The babes are constantly frolicking in my belleh and so everyone except for Rio (short attention span) has been able to feel their kicks and rolling limbs.

Not gonna lie: I’m tired, hungry and anxious most of the time. I haven’t been able to take the boys out that much lately and I’ve been feeling guilty about that. Luckily my dad and stepmom were here last week and the boys got to spend some quality time with them while I got to sit in front of the fan with my feet up. My dad re-did our bathroom floor and I LOVE IT.

IMG_2059Loooove. LOVE! And I am so happy that I don’t have to look at that nasty linoleum anymore.

Mad was my dad’s little helper the entire time. It was so cute.

IMG_2006It was a great week. Except for the part where Z got his teeth pulled. His adult teeth have started coming in and his baby teeth were NOT budging. He was getting more and more distressed about the changes going on inside his mouth, running his tongue along the jagged edge of the teeth bursting out of his gums and he had an open sore in no time. :( So we took him to the dentist and he was such a rock star that all he needed was laughing gas and some help from his puppet friends. We took him to get a toy afterwards and he chose- no joke- a dragon named Toothless.

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A couple of days ago I had my glucose test which I thankfully passed. I chose a different flavor this year and it was DISGUSTING (should’ve stuck with orange), but after my blood was taken we got to see the babes again. They’re both well over two pounds and looking good!

toods

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Filed under Mad Miles, Preggers in PDX, Preggerville, Stylefile, Thrift/Vintage

Gigantic: a big, big love

 

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SAM_1661Thrifted GAP dress, thrifted Talula leggings, Reef flip flops (ahhh Santa Barbara memories…)

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 24 weeks today, although at my last doctor’s appt a couple of days ago I was measuring 35 weeks. O_O Andy: “You’d think they’d have a different set of measurements for multiples.” Right? I mean, at 35 weeks, will I be measuring 50 weeks? And what will that MEAN.

Oh my god. My belly is gonna be so big, you guys. Oh my god. Will I even be able to cover it in the final weeks? STAY TUNED.

 toods

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Filed under Preggers in PDX, Preggerville, Stylefile, Thrift/Vintage