Category Archives: Shit just got real

Double the fun



SAM_157717 weeks preggo: Fossil (Ebay) top,  Levi’s jeans, Miz Mooz flats


SAM_158218 weeks preggo: Thrifted top, UO jeans, Tretorn rain boots

It’s been a long time. Shouldn’t have left you. Without a dope post to…read… to. >.>

Funny story: Andy and I had been going back and forth about having another kid. On days where the boys were particularly hard to handle I was like “Nope!” but then when I noticed that Rio’s baby fat was disappearing I was like “MOAR PLZ!” Andy mostly wanted to try for a girl. We both knew that there was a .5% chance of that happening, but we forged ahead with that good old Shettles method. TMI? Eh, we’re all adults here. ANYWAY. Six months later I was 3 days late and took a pregnancy test. The faintest of lines appeared. Andy pumped his fist, I got ready for the nausea to hit. AND BOY DID IT. “This…isn’t normal.” I told Andy. My stomach hurt like the DICKENS. My mind was foggy. There was this funny taste in my mouth. For three weeks I only got up to use the restroom and to (barely) eat. I felt like I was dying. Food was disgusting. And it wasn’t just food, everything I looked at or thought about took on this sinister tone. I started thinking about preparing a will (which I really should do anyway). Then I started bleeding. It was the cherry on the shit sundae that was my life.

I went in for an ultrasound to see if I was miscarrying. There on the screen, clear as day, were two embryos.  Aaaand I friggin’ burst into tears. When I told Andy (he was parking the car and ushering the boys into the office at the time of the u/s) he was shocked stupid. “Uh, what? Huh? HOW? Oh my god!”

How, indeed. My mom had twin brothers (fraternal) and apparently her father had twin siblings as well. Andy and I had joked about one day having twins and then we got tired just thinking about it. Whatever, bring it. Cuz twins are magical! I totally dropped two eggs and Andy totally fertilized them both! We’re magical creatures people!

Anyway, it all balanced out to the usual bearable nausea that I dealt with with my other pregnancies, and my bleeding (Caused by a subchorionic hemorrhage) stopped relatively soon afterwards. *sigh of relief*

I will never not find it funny that we went into this trying for one girl and will come out of it with two more boys. TWO! MORE! BOYS!

And I can’t wait to meet them.



Filed under Family, Life, Preggers in PDX, Preggerville, Shit just got real, Stylefile, Thrift/Vintage

Joy to my world

My Chies have come! Let Earth…receive….*trails off*

So I’ve mentioned my love of Chie Miharas once or twice and now I can finally say I own a pair! It doesn’t matter that I bought them (gently) used on Ebay. LOOK!

They’re so pretty! I told Andy, “I’m so excited! My first pair of Chies!” He gave me this funny look (I had just been talking about how they’re usually  3-4 hundred buckeroos, except I probably said dollars) and said, “You mean your ONLY pair?”

Silly child.



Filed under Happy Feet, Shit just got real, Stylefile

And the world spins madly on

So it got bleak for a moment there. I knew it would take some getting used to: juggling three kids, and on my own for the three months that I’m home, with varying needs and demands (and sometimes, all at the same time O_o). Just as I was beginning to feel a little less than overburdened, I GOT PINK EYE. Viral pink eye which is basically THE WORST kind to get? Because it lingers on for WEEKS and WEEKS? And is crazy disgusting to boot?

Yeah. I couldn’t decide if I wanted to curl up in a fetal position or hurl myself off of the St. Johns Bridge.

Pinkeye really, really sucks. Is it one word or two?


Luckily Andy was there to bring me back from the edge. I was also heartened by the fact that I was the only one that got it. I obsessively washed my hands and changed my pillowcases nightly and taped cotton rounds to my eye to keep this bit of loveliness to myself.


You’re also insanely adorable:

I love Halloween. There’s just something about dressing my kids up as predators and hearing people literally squeal in adoration. Because when I was a kid? My mother dressed my sisters and I up in sheets. Sadly we weren’t ghosts. We were wives and mothers of important men in the Bible. Weeeeee. And with that? A fire in my belly was LIT. As I lived and breathed, my children would be sharks and dragons!

P.S. Second best birthday present ever (the first being River)?

Gee Wawa Win Riding Boot.


Filed under Crazy Life, KIDS., Shit just got real

River Aeon

So, this happened:

One week ago today.

8 lbs, 4.5 oz.

 19.75 inches long.

Best birthday present ever.


Filed under Family, KIDS., Preggers in PDX, Shit just got real

Crazy beans with a side of awesomesauce

That’s basically my life right now. I’ve got a lot of emotions going on over here. There’s the overwhelming love I feel whenever I look at one (or both) of my boys, the overwhelming sense of pride when Z points at Mad’s nose and says, “No!” which of course means nose, unless he’s not pointing at a nose, and then it means no. He says no. A LOT. So then there’s that overwhelming sense of restraint when he screams it at me: I restrain myself from spanking my kid until he -what did my parents say?- can’t sit down for a week. Then he does something adorable again and I think I could never lift a finger to harm him.

Z is getting really attached to Bearison Ford, his Panda Bear. I think it might have something to do with trying to mimic holding a child himself. In any case, it’s very adorable. He woke up from a nap yesterday very fussy and only calmed down when Andy handed him his bear. (!) Also, he’s very obsessed with learning new words.

I’ve been trying to wear breastfeeding friendly tops to promote less nudity in public (the little we do go out) but to no avail: I exposed my large breasts (which were full of milk and practically bursting out of my bra) to a good many people at Fred Meyer’s a couple of days ago. I was wearing a henley top that decided to pop open at least three buttons – and I remained innocently unaware until I was loading the groceries into the car. *sigh*

I got two wisdom teeth extracted yesterday. Andy took the day off to help out with the kids and I’m glad he did. It was hard to focus on anything besides my aching mouth. I can’t believe you have to pay people to pull teeth out of your head WITH PLIERS. Isn’t that a form of torture? Mind you, the numbing helped with the pain but didn’t keep me from shaking like a leaf in fear. PLIERS.

Zain is throwing a fit. I suppose I should see to that.


Filed under Crazy Life, Mad Miles, Shit just got real, Z the Mighty

Jog. On.

“Still pregnant, eh?”

“When are you going to have that baby already?”

“You look so tired!”

“I feel your pain, I really do…”

Ahhhhh…the perfect comeback.

1 Comment

Filed under Preggerville, Rant, Shit just got real

Give me one reason to stay here.

*raises hand* New house, good jobs, stability?? Right. Portland it is. At least for the next 4-5 years.

A word of assvice: whatever you do, do NOT move to Portland and then complain about…anything having to do with Portland. People will act like you just ran over their dog. I don’t get it. It’s pretty, yes. There’s a lot of green…stuff and there’s…bridges! There’s a cool music scene, too. I think, though, that I would be way more jazzed about Portland if I loved any of the above: rain, snow, biking, hiking, jogging, beer, dogs (they’re okay, depending on the breed), paying to put said dog in “daycare”, eating extremely expensive organic foods, wearing tevas/clogs, etc.

So, Portlanders, contrary to popular belief you are NOT Joseph Stalin and this is not Elizabethan England, I demand my right to complain! Heh. I kid, but not really. I mean, you can’t whine about the rain without a dozen people telling you how much they looove it, and they can’t get enough of it! Bully for you, okay? And a lot of these people hate California but have never really been there. Like, they drove through it. ONCE. But they hate it, because…why? It’s sunny and clear and there are excessive amounts of attractive people? I’m confused (I think Portlanders equate L.A. with California, btw), but I can honestly say I don’t care one way or another!

What really chaps my hide is the way that Portlanders pat themselves on the back so frequently for doing things that either I REALLY DON’T GIVE A SHIT ABOUT or that should already be done in the first place, like recycling and eating healthy. Or staying in your own lane if you’re a cyclist. And they fancy themselves as being so liberal but the ignorance I’ve encountered here is staggering. I can’t begin to count the amount of people that I’ve met here who don’t know how to simply speak to someone of a different race or background without falling all over themselves in stupidity. People who call the Lloyd Center “ghetto” but can’t explain why exactly when pressed. Maybe it’s because that’s the mall where all the black people congregate? And they’re afraid to go see a movie there because they don’t want to get shot. PLEASE. I’ve mentioned that people have confused me with the one other black woman that worked in my office, right? A woman who looked NOTHING LIKE ME. Or how I worked for a man who couldn’t wait to tell me about the black girl that he had sex with in high school? Or the black girl that he walked in on his son having sex with? Or how if my opinions differed from the only other black employee’s, he would say, “Steve doesn’t feel that way…” Or the girl who asked me if it was okay that she listened to rap music since she wasn’t a “gang-banger”? And these are the same people who act shocked to hear me say that this city is too white bread and that I cannot see myself settling down here for good. YA THINK? o_O

Before you get your panties in a bunch: Look, idiots are everywhere. I’m not claiming Portland has any more or any less. This is a big city and I have hardly met everyone in it…blah blah blah. What I am saying is that Portland needs a healthy sprinkling of color all up and through this place. ALL UP AND THROUGH.

1 Comment

Filed under Portland, Rant, Shit just got real, Truly?