I'm not fat, I'm pregnant.

35 weeks

35 weeks

Buuuut I’m mostly fat since the baby is about 5 pounds now and I’m 35 pounds heavier. HUZZAH!

So apparently I can’t take good pictures anymore…but you get the idea. Just pay attention to my large belly and the fact that my 20 month old can take cover beneath it. THIRTY FIVE WEEKS. It’s so close. So close! I could weep with relief. Because, um, it’s now become a chore to walk and get up from a seated position. I’m on my last legs people.

I’ve been sick this past week with a cold and have subjected several people to my curiously stretchy snot while blowing my nose. Except I can’t really blow it because my nose has been stuffed up so I have to do that gross thing where I shove tissue into the leaky nostril. It’s pretty sick and I apologize to all who have had to witness it (Andy, Kerrie,etc).

Back to uncomfortable pregnancies: It’s hard enough having one fetus crammed up in mah belleh,  I’m trying to imagine having EIGHT. Jeebus CHRIST. Human beings are not meant to have fucking litters. Stop. the. insanity.

I have to pee.



Filed under Preggerville, Shit just got real, Truly?

5 responses to “I'm not fat, I'm pregnant.

  1. She did too.
    Multiple times.

  2. Um. I have no idea how else to say this: GREAT CAESAR’S GHOST.

    I’ve got gasted flabber over here.

  3. meg

    I adore it, the belly that is, and little mister is so freaking adorable, like you’re going to leave or something and he figures if he stands real close you won’t be able to…we’re attempting to work out a trip to the North…we shall see.

  4. meg

    p.s. how do you wear pants?

  5. Jen

    Very carefully. 🙂

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